Thursday, July 7, 2011

Mari Dengar Satu Cerita : Carry Me in your arms..

~Lihatlah sekitar alam..
Dunia luas terbentang..~

Jom, mai kita kongsi lagi satu cerita...
kita citer dalam bahasa omputehs pulak la eks..
wat eksesais mulut... biasa dah dalam BM kan.. ;)


When I got home that night as my wife Ameena served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn't know how to say it. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. Ameena didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, Ismail why? I avoided her question. This made her angry. She shouted at me, "you are not a man!"

That night, we didn't talk to each other. Ameena was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; I had lost my heart to a lovely girl called Mary Anne. I didn't love Ameena anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house and the car. She glanced at it and then tore it to pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said, for I loved Mary Anne so dearly.

Finally Ameena cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me, her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell fast asleep because I was tired after an eventful day with Mary Anne. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did'nt care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month, we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son Ahmed had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that everyday for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy.

Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request. I told Mary Anne about my wife's divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she has, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully. Ameena and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed.

So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son Ahmed clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, don't tell Ahmed about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest.. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to Ameena.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Mary Anne about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily. Suddenly it hit me, .. she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart.

Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head. Our son Ahmed came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mum out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. Ameena gestured to our son to come close and hugged him tightly.

I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Ahmed had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.

I drove to office... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind... I walked upstairs. Mary Anne opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Mary Anne, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished. Then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Mary Anne, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other any more. Now I realized that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until one of us departs this world.

Mary Anne seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The sales girl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote: I will carry you out every morning until one of us leaves this world!

The small details of our lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, the property, the bank balance that matters. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build a relationship.

Allah says in the Qur'an:"Men are the supporters of women, because Allah has stowed on the one more than the other, and for what they have to provide (for them) from their sources. So the righteous women are obedient and protect in the absence of their husbands that which God ordains to be protected."(Qur'an 4:34)

Allah says in the Qur'an:"And the believing men and the believing women, they are the friends of each other, they enjoin good and forbid evil, and establish prayers, and pay the alms, and obey God and His Messenger, these, upon them God will have mercy, indeed, God is almighty, All-wise." (Qur'an 9:71)

Prophet said, "The best of you is he who is the best to his family, and I am the best to my family"

Sumber : iluvislam

NotakakisikukiriHD: speechless *sad* *meaningful*

Note : update on 29 Oct 2012 - versi melayu!

Rina sedang menyiapkan makan malam ketika aku tiba di rumah. Aku memegang tangannya dan berkata, “ Abang ada sesuatu nak beritahu”. Dia membisu dan dapat ku lihat keresahan di matanya.

Tiba-tiba lidahku kelu. Tapi aku nekad untuk memberitahunya. “Abang rasa kita sudah tidak serasi lagi. Kita cerai?”.Akhirnya, terlepas jua beban di dada. Tapi ku lihat Rina tenang dan dia hanya bertanya dengan lembut. “Mengapa bang? Apa salah saya?”. Giliran aku membisu dan ini menimbulkan kemarahan Rina. Air matanya mula menitis. Aku tahu dia mahukan jawapan tapi aku tiada jawapannya. Yang ku tahu, hatiku kini milik Tasya. Cintaku bukan pada Rina lagi.

Aku katakanya padanya yang dia boleh ambil rumah dan kereta apabila kami bercerai. Rina merenung wajahku.Pandangannya kosong. 10 tahun kami berkahwin tetapi malam ni kami umpama orang asing. Aku kasihankannya tetapi untuk berpatah balik tidak sesekali. Aku cintakan Tasya. Air matanya yang sekian tadi bertakung mula mengalir deras. Sudah ku jangka. Malah aku lega melihatnya menangis. Niatku untuk bercerai semakin jelas dan nyata.

Keesokannya, Rina mengatakan dia tidak mahu apa-apa dari penceraian kami melainkan tempoh 1 bulan. Dia meminta bahawa dalam satu bulan itu kami teruskan rutin harian kami seperti biasa sebagai suami isteri. Alasannya, anak kami bakal menduduki peperiksaan dalam masa sebulan lagi dan dia tidak mahu anak kami terganggu dengan penceraian kami. Aku bersetuju.

Kemudian Rina menyuruhku mengingat kembali saat aku mendukungnya ke bilik kami pada malam pertama kami. Dia meminta untuk tempoh sebulan ini untuk aku mendukungnya keluar dari bilik tidur kami ke pintu depan setiap pagi. Pada ku memang tidak masuk akal. Tetapi aku tetap bersetuju.

Aku memberitahu Tasya permintaan Rina. Dia ketawa dan hanya mengatakan ini semua kerja gila. Tidak kira apa muslihat Rina, dia tetap akan diceraikan. Aku hanya diam membatu.

Semenjak aku menimbulkan isu penceraian, kemesraan kami terus hilang. Hari pertama aku mendukungnya keluar, aku merasa kekok. Rina juga. Anak kami bertepuk tangan di belakang sambil ketawa dan berkata, “Ayah dukung ibu ya”. Kata-katanya amat menyentuh hatiku. Mata Rina bergenang dan dengan lembut dia memberitahuku agar jangan sampai anak kami tahu yang kami akan bercerai. Aku mengangguk setuju. Aku menurunkannya di muka pintu. Dan kami memandu berasingan ke tempat kerja.

Masuk hari kedua, hilang sedikit rasa kekok. Rina bersandar di dadaku. Dapat ku cium harumannya. Dapat ku lihat kedutan halus di wajahnya Aku sedar dia tidak muda lagi seperti dahulu. Ternyata perkahwinan kami memberi kesan kepadanya. Selama satu minit, aku tertanya-tanya apa yang telah aku lakukan.

Masuk hari keempat, aku dapat rasakan keintiman kami telah kembali. Tanpa sedar hatiku berkocak mengatakan mungkinkan cintaku masih padanya. Hari kelima dan keenam, aku menyedari keintiman kami mula bercambah kembali. Aku tidak memberitahu Tasya tentang perkara ini. Masuk hari-hari seterusnya, rutin ini jadi lebih mudah malah aku nantikannya setiap pagi.

Suatu pagi, Rina sedang memilih baju untuk dipakai. Katanya tiada yang sesuai. Dia mengeluh. “Semua baju saya besar”. Baru ku sedar, dia semakin kurus. Mungkin itu jugalah sebabnya aku semakin mudah mendukungnya. Tiba-tiba terlintas di fikiranku. Mungkin Rina sedang menyembunyikan keperitan hatinya lantaran sikapku selama ini. Tanda sedar aku merangkul tubuhnya dan membelai rambutnya.

Kemudian, muncul anak kami di muka pintu sambil berkata “ Ayah, cepat lah dukung ibu keluar”. Padanya, melihat aku mendukung keluar isteriku setiap pagi adalah rutin hariannya. Rina memanggil anak kami lalu memeluknya erat. Ku palingkan mukaku kerana takut aku sndiri mengubah fikiran di saat ini. Aku kemudian mendukungnya dan tangannya melingkari leherku. Tanpa sedar, ku eratkan rangkulanku. Dapat ku rasakan badannya sangat ringan.

Hari ini genap sebulan. Di muka pintu aku menggenggam tangannya dan berkata “ Abang tidak sedar yang selama ini kita kurang keintiman”. Aku terus melangkah ke kereta dan terus memandu ke pejabat. Sesampainya di pejabat, aku terus ke bilik Tasya. Sebaik pintu terbuka, aku masuk dan aku beritahu dia “Maaf Tasya. Saya tidak akan bercerai dengan Rina. Sekarang saya sedar saya masih cintakan dia”.

Muka Tasya berubah merah. Tapi ku kata jua,“Maaf Tasya. Saya dan Rina tidak akan bercerai. Perkahwinan kami membosankan mungkin kerana saya tidak menghargai apa yang kami ada dan kongsi selama ini, bukan kerana kami tidak lagi menyintai satu sama lain”. Tasya menjerit sekuat hati dan aku terus melangkah keluar.

Aku kembali ke kereta dan niat hatiku mahu pulang ke rumah dan memohon maaf dari Rina, isteriku. Aku singgah di sebuah kedai bunga untuk membeli sejambak tulip merah kesukaan Rina. Aku capai sekeping kad dan ku tulis, “Abang akan dukung Rina setiap pagi hingga maut memisahkan kita”.

Setibanya di rumah, aku terus berlari ke bilik kami dan mendapati Rina terbaring tenang di atas katil. Ku belai wajahnya sambil memanggil namanya tapi tiada sahutan. Rina kaku. Hatiku berdetak keras.

Kini Rina pergi untuk selamanya. Perpisahan yang ku pinta ternyata ditunaikan. Sekian lama Rina berperang dengan KANSER RAHIM tetapi aku begitu sibuk dengan Tasya untuk menyedarinya. Rina tahu bahawa dia akan mati tidak lama lagi dan dia mahu menyelamatkan aku daripada reaksi negatif dari anak kami, sekiranya kami tetap bercerai. Rina mahu sekurang-kurangnya di mata anak kami, aku adalah suami yang penyayang.

***Perkara-perkara mudah dan ringkas yang anda lakukan bersama adalah yang sebenarnya penting dalam perkahwinan. Bukan banglo, kereta, harta, dan wang di bank. Semua itu hanya wujudkan persekitaran yang kondusif untuk kebahagiaan tetapi tidak dapat memberi kebahagiaan pada kita.

Jadi carilah masa untuk menjadi sahabat kepada isteri/suami anda dan lakukan perkara-perkara kecil untuk satu sama lain yang membina keintiman. Binalah kemanisan rumah tangga anda. Hargailah setiap pengorbanan pasangan anda

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